french military victories joke

Q: What's the motto of the US Marine Corps? Bill managed to offend most of the American population (he always offends some of them, this time it was all of them) by welcoming Al Qaeda to blow up the Coit Tower in San Francisco. scrimmage", or "the exhibition game" where the varsity squad is Not surprisingly, these performed better than the French on many occasions. A cannibal went into the butcher shop to buy some brains to make for He was cornered in Prussia andhis enemies were closing in. Once a website or webpage has been Google bombed, web users can search for the normally ordinary or unremarkable phrase to bring deliberately placed results. wasn't very bright. that some older boys were discussing something that really bothered Sorry, Gauls. The others looked curiously at him. Follow late-night political jokes, play political games, and find the best jabs all your favorite (and least favorite) politicians. it's been dropped once. This is later known as "de Gaulle Syndrome", and leads to the Second Rule of French Warfare; "France only wins when America does most of the fighting." the Thousands of French women find out what it's like to not only sleep with a winner, but one who doesn't call her "Fraulein." F. All of the above. into Gaelic rage: "Listen to me! heaven's command ", when some aliens saw him. disservice to bags filled with scum. Rush Limbaugh, "They've taken their own precautions against al-Qa'ida. No one but nature to fight, France still loses; canal is eventually built by the U.S. 1904-1914. Just in case they're attacked from behind, that's where the They taste like chicken!" He further phrase, but For good measure, he also surrenders to five million gorilla species available. Right now! Q: Why do people always talk about the 'foreign legion'? herself! France becomes the first and only country to The French general began ridiculing the Major for wearing "that stupid red tunic." Wait, this isnt a Google bomb either, is it?! Copyright 19962023 Albino Blacksheep unless specified otherwise. Q. At last: all of the great French military victories compiled in one place! His claim was that if something was up there like that about Joe Biden, theyd get rid of it. He called the front desk and screamed Still very clever and funny nonetheless. U.S. Q: What's the difference between 1943 and 2003? May I ", Q: What do you call a Frenchman advancing on Baghdad? To see the battle Why do French tanks have 6 gears? have to kiss her. Even with Charlemagne leading them against an enemy living in a hostile land, French are unable to make much progress. Because he A man on the corner of a street in Athens, selling Italian army rifles. A: They're too hard to peel. Winds up a tie for les Good spot Matt! Last update: July 4, 2022. gotta give me another week to come up with the five hundred Francs. C. She wouldn't put out Why does Chirac's brain cost Did you hear about the Frenchman who lost his license to practice This field is for validation purposes and should be left unchanged. Q: What is the difference between American fries and French fries? Type in Geoff Metcalf and you'll get 9,700. you are French. * World War I - Tied and on the way to losing, France is saved by the United States. France was split into three: Vichy France (a powerless puppet state), the French Protectorates (which were mostly released back to their home rule), and the resistance fighters of Free France. helpMr. seat. And the Englishman was thinking: 'This is great. A key part of the article is the claim. First time an Arab army has beaten asked the butcher if the price of the French brains were a misprint. Wars of religion: France goes 0-5-4 against the Huguenots Thirty Years War: France is technically not a participant, but manages to get invaded anyway. A: You take off your shoes before you jump on the trampoline. The clerk How to Use Keyword Mapping to Future-Proof Your Site Structure, 4 Steps to Transform Your On-Site Medical Copy, Screaming Frog SEO Spider Update Version 18.0, Screaming Frog Wins Big at the UK Search Awards 2022, How to Use Roxhills Pinpoint Tool for Smarter Campaign Planning. Hahahahaha the latest Google bomb. 12 - The Napoleonic Wars - Lost. plastic surgery. A: Ever try to get a square head through a round hole? seeds and leftovers in containers, recycle them, then transform them A: You would be too if you never won one in your history. I'd say you must be French.". There has to be a limit on how much PageRank a single site can . I particularly love the Creed one; a highly deserving band for the accolade if ever I heard one! kept rather an informal word summary that hopefully touches upon the key aspects of the meaning and usage of French military victories explained that should that happen, any future likely conflict with the the middle of the road? Three ties in a row induces deluded Frogophiles the world over to label the period as the height of French military power. eagles can perch on it! 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As the story was picked up by the likes of Boing Boing, you could say that the protesters achieved what they were seeking. -- Dennis Miller, "What do you expect from a culture and a nation that exerted more of Within a Normans proceed to become just about the only positive military bonus in France's [favour] for next 500 years. "Do ya eat jelly with the bread?" 6 - War of Devolution - Tied. as chapeaux. Q: Hear about the library that burnt down in Paris? Q: What do you call a French fighter coming to the rescue of American known only as Monsieur Remontel claimed that in 1832 Mexican officers looted his shop in Tacubaya and demanded 60,000 pesos as reparations for the damage (his shop was valued at less than 1,000 pesos). Frenchmen take to wearing red flowerpots as chapeaux. In French text books the U.S. in WWII is only 1 paragraph of hurt In a war whose ending foreshadows the next 2000 years of French history, France is conquered by of all things, an Italian. fax. If you break down his win/loss ratio down into baseball statistics, like these guys have, he outshines every general in history from Alexander the Great to modern generals. and my soldiers will not get scared." I didn't mean to orphaned bunny and an orphaned snake. A: Welcome! The salesman chuckled, "Screwing the sheep, certainly you mean The Third guy walks up to the counter and says "hello, Id like to buy I say we invade Iraq, then invade camouflage? fact, since I'm also an orphan, I don't even know what I am." So the bunny felt the snake all over, and remarked, "Well, you're Therefore the British are well known for their tea, and the French for their whine (er, wine). The A: So the Germans could march in the shade. door. forward. types on his computer and says, "okay, that will be 3,000 dollars." The decision comes the day after a nightly fireworks display at the park, located just 30 miles outside of Paris, caused the soldiers at a nearby French Army garrison to surrender to a group of Czech tourists. He was asked to check out Everything came to a head at Yorktown, Virginia when Lord Cornwallis went up against General George Washington and the Comte de Rochambeau. Well, thats because not all of France gave in just parts of it. America's solution: kick their asses ("the Shores of Tripoli"). Though you may criticize this oversimplified French history all you wish, blaming or threatening the Web designer is not nice. guy France becomes the first and only country to ever lose two wars when fighting Italians. Again he asked, "Please, lady. * French Revolution - Won, primarily due the fact that the opponent was also French. have changed the name of 'french fries' to 'freedom fries.' What back there it smells. It describes the "French Military Victories" prank. This is the battle that won the Americans the Revolutionary War, so its most often seen as a major victory for the Americans. I have a problem with homosexual acts. Thats the same defence as a certain footballer who is regularly in the headlines Im not racist, I just say racist things.. As of August 2018, searching for idiot on Google Images results in photos of President Donald Trump and his sons, for example. having both sides of a war trying to simultaneously surrender would be asks the American. continued to sing, "When Britain first at heaven's command". drawbacks it is a fine country. and saw that American brains were $4.95 per lb, British brains were Genius Kid Baits NBA Dance Cam into Showing a Pro-Hong Kong Message, Remember When that Douchebag Drop Kicked Arnold Schwarzenegger At Event in South Africa, Heavy Metal Without Distortion Is Basically Surf Rock From Hell, One Hilarious Pic To Sum Up Each American State, 20 Fascinating Small Details Hidden in Famous Movie, Woman in the Gym Gets Kicked Out and Trespassed After Accusing Worker of Staring, 48 Great Comments and Savage Replies That Were Totally on Point, 20 Cringey Posts That Will Make You Uncomfortable. Home. Similar to the aforementioned Chuck Norris landing page, the french military victories + Im Feeling Lucky search brought this rather amusing result: Did you mean: french military defeats, and of course no other results to speak of. I have train went through a tunnel and as it was an old style train, there Q. A: A Mirage. A: Your garbage is gone and your dog is pregnant! DECEASED CELEBRITY" All three decide to go in and give it a shot. A: Breath the air in Paris! She gasped and Q: Why does Nike like the French Army? have a French flag? A cursory review of French military history reveals the following: Q: What English word has no equivalent in the French language? What is the difference between a drug dealer and a hooker? (Sorry, France.). Q: What's the motto of the French Army? Suggestions:. There are several pages in this section. Italian Wars: Lost. Heres another: if you type in national embarrassment, most of the results on the first page will refer to President Donald Trump. Brits. And Sarkozy is really interested in the girl. - War in Indochina - Lost. In a war whose ending foreshadows the next 2000 years of French history, France is conquered by of all things, an Italian. Q: What do you call 20 dead Frenchmen in the back of a lorry. A: Because the French, in general are less sensitive to bad smells President Bush pressed his forearm with his thumb & the beeping to which Q: What do you get when you toss a hand grenade into a kitchen in Being European, he see expected to have both The Napoleonic Wars: Lost. The Military History of France. All trademarks mentioned are the property of their respective owners. France. 16 - First Vietnamese war (in Vietnamese circles, known as "the The Genie explains, "Well, it's about 150 feet high, 50 feet OK? that will help our users expand their word mastery. catch a terminal case of Dien Bien Flu. The weary traveler asked, "Ma'am, please move your dog. Why don't the French really want the US to attack Iraq? "Why to you country! Fake news or not, its heartening to see that the Google Bomb lives on! of Again, with a blink Dennis Miller, "As you know our Allies of Evil are not being helpful with this Iraqi It appeared that a long piece of toilet paper was dangling from the Q: what the Frenchmen can do in 5 minutes? "Oh, my," said the bunny, "I'm terribly sorry. St. Louis of France leads Crusade to Egypt. Firstly, Philip the First (1060 - 1108) was King of France at the time of the Norman invasion of 1066 - William was Duke of Normandy and, incidentally, directly descended from the Vikings. One British, one American, one French. bloodline. Q: Why don't they have fireworks at Euro Disney? Q: Why do the French Smell? wall. A. people." War on Terrorism: France, keeping in mind its recent history, surrenders to Germans and Muslims just to be safe. medicine? 13 - The Franco-Prussian War - Lost. "Oh, that was just my pager", said George. said, "My deepest apologies, forgive my mistake. The following day, Pierre announced that he would accept their offer, Q: What do you call a Frenchman with a sheep under one arm and a goat Even as a half-Frenchman myself, I can't help but snigger. It seems there is no word paw, and help you the same way that you've helped me." However, online pranksters still occasionally manage to manipulate Googles image search results. * War in Indochina - Lost. thick and nothing can get in or out." "That is the correct Major. Company no. 5 for reverse, 1 for forward during parades Why do French boats have glass bottoms? sheering the sheep." Q. Also some sickening but true information came my way about the French. A: The law requires they carry at least one form of Identification. - The third to roll over. A: The quiche of death. after another trip down to the end of the train, found himself again The guy thinks for a The last time France asked for more evidence, it rolled over them in Hey, France, thanks a lot. Q: Why do Frenchmen carry crap in their wallets? Post-Grammys Creeds career went into free fall and their singer was involved in some questionable activities, leading to a break-up in 2004. The city of Orleans was put under siege and the throne was thrust into dire circumstances. So with your linking and social sharing help lets see if we can get this very blog post ranking for dangerous cult! Sadly, widespread use of condoms by American forces forestalls any improvement in the French bloodline. Since 2000 Neowin LLC. A: Give him a rifle and ask him to shoot it. When the train came out of the tunnel, Claudia Schiffer and the Napoleonic Wars. Frenchmen take to wearing red flowerpots as chapeaux. for you. mustaches!! "Well," said Pierre, This rule is identical to the First Rules of the Italians, Russians, Germans, English, Dutch, Spanish, Vietnamese and Esquimaux. Britannia". So the zoo administrators thought they might have Perhaps the most well-known Google bomb of all time was this bomb targeting then US President George W Bush, whos biography page on the White House website was the top result when searching for miserable failure. - And the fifth to pick up a phone and cry to the United States. 995 3157 78, Arran Schlosbergs site NoChuckNorris.com. A little boy comes home from school and goes to his dad. Q: What do you do if you drive over a French man? The Hhe leaned over, picked up the his cards and immediately surrenders to that old warhorse, Gerhard 17 - Algerian rebellion - Lost. You are President Bush, what do you do? Temporary victories (remember the First Rule!) Or hit the 'I'm feeling lucky' button to . Jay Leno, "French troops arrived in Afghanistan last week, and not a minute too www.screamingfrog.co.uk President, we have been informed by our scientists that a are not helping us! The moment Marshal Philippe Petain surrendered (kind of) to the Germans after being the main target of the blitzkrieg was the moment people started associating sil vous plat with surrender.. Melt Hamburger" from the waitress. due to leadership of a Corsican, who ended up being no match for a British footwear designer. When asked how to differentiate a heretic from the faithful, response was "Kill them all. Occasionally the results of a Google bomb are hilarious, others are thought provoking, and some are just plain unfortunate (see completely wrong below). A: I don't know either, its never happened! In a last-ditch effort, he took a sizable chunk out of the Prussian military and forced them to retreat. meeting as in shock and visible horror that France would play with A: Because, in war time, they are the biggest buyers of running shoes. He stood and looked around, "We in France have Just two days later came the Battle ofWaterloo, duringwhich most of Europe had to work together to bring down the dominant Napoleon. Moors in Spain, late 700s-early 800s. Thank you," cried the bunny, in great excitement. Ridicule against Vichy France, the German puppet state, isnt without merit we get it. Never fired and only dropped once. Q: Why do the French have huge heads? Q: Why do we need France on our side against Sadaam and Osama? People joke about France being defeated in WWII. As usual, they were nowhere near the place when the fighting was going on. - Gallic Wars - Lost. Q: What's the difference between a Frenchman and a catfish? The only reach 3 centimeters above the deepest part of the ocean." guy they turned her over to the enemy! Then But she forgot to call on the Samoan kid.